Estimated

I am so grateful to have received  MADS award nominations, especially in categories that had never even crossed my mind, such as Blog of the Year and Blog Writer of the Year. The fact that one person, at least, comes here for the writing is just the most lovely compliment. Thank you to anyone who has thought of me and if you haven’t voted yet and feel you could include me then please click on the badge over to the right. It has also made me feel that I am slacking on the blogging front and that I owe you a post, so the kick in the pants in most welcome too. Thank you again.

I am a contrary creature, always have been. My parents often tell that the way to get me to do something was to ask me to do the opposite “You don’t need a coat, do you Emily?” “You don’t need a wee before we leave the house, do you?”. It seems I am no different nearly forty years later.

I have passed my due date and I feel healthier and happier than I have for almost the whole pregnancy. It helps that I am not ill for the first time in weeks and most of the annoying pregnancy side effects have eased a bit.  A sense of calm has descended on me, just as everyone is commenting on how fed up I must be feeling and how I must just want baby to hurry up and be born. I shrug and tell them it will come when it comes.

Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t had a change of personality, I often do the shrugging through gritted teeth, as frankly I’d rather not dwell on when it is arriving, or answer questions about whether anything is happening, or if I have felt the baby drop…….blah blah blah. Remaining in a Zen like state takes a bit of work, as I wrote last time we were in this position. What I want is to be distracted, not do much and hibernate a bit. It seems that it is everyone else who is fixated on when the baby will appear and I am just quietly waiting, telling myself that due dates are estimated and don’t mean much at all.

Of course I have days when I am very tired and achey and nothing gets done and even on good days like today, when I have surprising energy to begin with and the sun is shining, by the time Mckdaddy gets home and we tackle bedtime, I am weary and longing for a warm bath and bed.

Maybe all of this calm just means I am ready. I have scrubbed enough skirting boards, folded enough baby clothes and made enough lists and that I am ready for what is to come, whenever that may be.

Now seems a good time to thank all of you who either comment here or chat with me on twitter for all your fantastic support while I’ve been pregnant. I’ve made no secret of the fact that I am not a glowing pregnant type and this space has been invaluable over the past year, while we tried, failed and then succeeded. The online world gives us an opportunity to say things we wouldn’t always feel we could say in our real lives and there is always someone to say that they get it. The fact that most of you find a way to say that with wit, humour and kindness makes it all the more precious. Thank you.

Hopefully next time I post it will be with baby news, or at least a completed baby blanket! Either way I will have something new to show you.

Photo 25-02-2014 13 37 41

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