I am lucky enough to be with a man who is not afraid to show his sensitive side. More fool him as I would regularly tease him as he hid his watery eyes behind the sleeve of his jumper. (He admitted to me early on that the film ‘Big’ made him cry and never lived it down.) However, since I became a Mum I have joined him around the box of tissues and only have to hear the first strands of a Coldplay song used on a soundtrack to know that I’m going to start blubbing. I can rarely make it to the end of an episode of Grey’s Anatomy without snivelling and even the BBC’s latest crime drama, Five Days, had me wanting to turn off as a newborn was abandoned at a hospital.
It is not just fiction that has a more profound affect on my emotions. MckDaddy telling me about a child in his class whose parents don’t wash or dress in clean clothes and the other kids avoid because they smell or an old man in the supermarket whose basket only contains a small bottle of whisky, a tin of cat food, some meals for one and a packet of biscuits, would both make me feel sad. More seriously many stories in the news that I previously would have only given a passing thought to, pray on my mind or quite often I simply have to turn the radio or TV off as I just find them too upsetting.
Why has this happened to me? Surely it can’t be those damn hormones still, Mini Mck is nearly 11 months old. If not that, perhaps it is a bigger and more permanent change in my personality.
By experiencing this amazing overwhelming love for my child it is even harder to comprehend someone who could hurt theirs own or allow someone else to. Also, whilst you can never know how it feels to have a terribly sick child or lose a child, unless it has happened to you, it takes very little to imagine how awful it must be.
So, is this a bad thing? Do I need to pull myself together? I think these changes show I am softer now, more empathetic and understand true, harsh, unconditional love, making me a richer person in the process. So, I think the best thing would be to keep a box of tissues handy and invest in some waterproof mascara.
What about you? Are you more emotional now that you are a parent? What crazy things do you find yourself getting teary eyed over?
There are many things that I expected would change once I became a mother. I knew that I would have much less time to spend doing the things that I enjoy, I knew that I would have to put someone else’s needs before my own. What I did not expect was that I would become choked up and emotional on a regular basis.